Howdy-Do – How does Vinta, your beloved wife, feel about not being able to become Queen of Chaos and your mutual children cut out of the succession to the Chaos Throne?
“In addition to bein’ beautiful, my wife is an articulate and intelligent woman, so if you wanna know what she’s feelin’, you should ask her. I can say that both of us are close to our families, and we’re pleased that the call of duty won’t be puttin’ a creation’s worth of distance ‘tween us and them.”
HD – “Would this be said to be an dereliction of duty or perhaps being a royal malingerer?”
“If someone was lookin’ to pick a fight, I guess that’s some words they could use. But anyone who’d be flappin’ their jaws like that probably isn’t someone I’d waste the time to listen to. If I actually gave a damn about what people sat about me, I’d never get any real work done.”
HD – There are rumours that Swayville had caused a Benedict Project child of yours to prevent Tubble Channicut from succeeding you if you died or gave up the throne.
“Huh. Dunno what a Benedict Project is, but it sounds kinda gross…uh, do you have an actual question?”
HD – “If you had an unknown child with pedigree papers saying he was your heir, how would you feel?
“I might be annoyed with whoever his mama is for not givin’ me a little advance notice. Other’n that, it’d depend on the circumstances. You’re askin’ me to speculate on a whole lot of imponderables.”
HD – You have been deposed as titular Grand Duke of Jesby by your cousin Gloriana. What are your thoughts?
“I pretty much consider myself happy to be well quit of Chaos and everyone and everything there.”
HD – “Do you get along with your Jesby side of the family?”
“There’s a couple I get on okay with. The rest, we go on our own ways and are the happier for it.”
HD – How are relations with your Jesby relatives?
“Distant.”
HD – “But you came to Amber as an invader with the Jesby controlled Chaos Army of the West?”
“When you’re part of the minor nobility out in the Black Zone, and the your liege lord in Chaos orders you to get your gear and start marchin’, that’s what you do. So that’s what I did. We got curb-stomped at Ellsmere, and the rest was history.
HD – How do you get along with your father Gerard? Does he have you lobby Geran for more money to the Royal Amber Navy?
“Me and dad get along real well. He makes all the bad and the crazy that it took to get to Amber worth it. Lucky ain’t the word for it. And he doesn’t need me to do any lobbying. He’s his own best spokesman.”
HD – “Do you think the Royal Amber Navy is underfunded?”
“I don’t have access to the numbers and the mission analysis to be makin’ that kind of judgment. But it is tellin’ that Corwin’s naval assault got stopped cold, and Chaos didn’t even bother invadin’ by ship. So, we need to make sure the Navy is healthy.”
HD – How is your grandmother Rilga convalescing?
“Well, praise the Unicorn.”
HD – “Are you making changes to the Reformed Church of the Unicorn?”
“I can’t ‘make’ changes, really. I don’t have that kinda power. I’m just a man who occasionally speaks from his heart. Sometimes I’m lucky enough to speak a big-T kinda truth, and changes happen.”
HD – Do you think Gana stabbing her with a javelin was a conspiracy?
“I think Gana was a certified nutjob. I’m too thankful for my granny’s recovery to go rootin’ up rumors and whispers of the past.”
HD – “So she will not be recommended to marry any of your boys?”
“Heh. No.”
HD – You and Matthew love to go on the rampage. Before Patrick became the Overking and erased it, the North Vietnamese Communist regime declared you both war criminals. Can you comment?
“A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do, and sometimes a man’s gotta steal a tank, drink some booze, and knock over a bank. Sometimes people don’t like that, and that’s when you get what we have here.”
HD – “We heard that Prince Patrick gave the tank to Matthew and its up on display in Antilla Palace. What do you think?”
“I’m sure it makes a fine decoration.”
HD – Do you have plans for the Antilla railway to have a rail/canal system to reach your territory?
“There’s some big-ass technical considerations to look at first, before I can even start to comment on further feasability.”
HD – “Which are?”
“Movin’ things in places where a rail engine won’t work. Makin’ track that’ll stand up to loads. Gettin’ and distributin’ feed and water to the draft beasts we’ll probably have to use to pull the thing.”
HD – What is your favourite colour and why?
“My kiddos’ got the most beautiful eyes I ever did see.”
HD – “What colour is that?”
“Julie’s are hazel, Gerry’s are brown.”
HD – You love flamboyant dressing styles. What are your plans for the upcoming fashion world?
“Well, I for sure aren’t wrappin’ myself in black like it seems every other member of my generation likes to do. I think they got some underlyin’ psychological deficiencies and insecurities, and they wear black because they think it makes ‘em look like some kinda badass. But that’s okay. There’s always help for those kinda conditions.”
HD – What is your next outfit planned for Court in Amber City?”
“Oh, I don’t know. It’s not like I sit around makin’ this stuff up. I got a couple tailors, they show me some designs and sketches, I tell ‘em what I like. Heh. Or sometimes it’s Vinta tellin’ ‘em what I should like.”
HD – How well do balance the needs to be loyal to the Crown and the Northern nobles in Amber who look to you as a spokesman?
“‘Fraid I don’t see any conflict that I need to ‘balance’, any more than say, Prince Andres, who’s also showin’ an inspirin’ concern for those that need a champion in the north. We’re just doin’ our part to help his majesty look after the needs of the kingdom.”
HD – It is said that you have a direct pipeline to Prince John, the Royal Secretary and the King of Amber. How has this benefited you and the nobles who look up to you?
“I’m a senior member of His Majesty’s government. Wouldn’t be there if the King and Prince John didn’t feel I was capable for the job. So of course they’re gonna listen if I got some policy suggestions.”
HD – You head other jobs including the Black Fleet. What is that all about?
“The Black fleet deals with unconventional threats. You wouldn’t like the consequences if I was to tell you anymore. I’m also on the Star Chamber. His Majesty prob’ly put me there to ensure that when justice is done, mercy and charity get to have their say.
HD – Is it true you are spearheading plans to reform the Reformed Church of the Unicorn. Lately church leaders have become less inflammatory.
“I occasionally speak my thoughts as the Unicorn moves me. There’s some people as choose to listen. I like to think I’m just helpin’ people get where they wanna go.”
HD – “Do you have religious ecstasy?”
“Hah! No, I won’t presume to claim that.”
HD – Prince Lucius and Prince Jericho caused Caine to suicide in a battle in shadow. Later, his soul horcruxes were destroyed in the Battle of Troutdale with Ian and Edward helping Lucius. Do you feel any regret over the death of your father’s full brother?
“I’ve lost count of how many times people said Caine was dead and they been proved wrong.”
HD – Do you think he will return?
“I’m not sayin’ he will. But I’m not sayin’ he won’t, either.”
HD – How well do you get along with Julian, your uncle and do you visit Arden much?
“I don’t get to visit Arden nearly as much as I’d like. Uncle Julian is an awesome godfather to my kids, and my daughter’s namesake. We get along real well.
HD – Why do you think Julian had the hell hounds chase Tone up a tree and keep him there for days?
“If I was to guess, Tone was prob’ly bein’ annoyin’, and Julian didn’t want to have to deal with him.”
HD – Geran lately invaded Eregnor and returned it to Kashfa. Does this raise security concerns?
“I consider it a security concern pretty much anytime Geran or any of his children is allowed to play with sharp objects.”
HD – Why is that? Is he considered rash?
“Yeah. Kinda like the sun is considered warm.”
HD – Are you involved with Vinta’s wine operations. We understand she wants to make more northern vineyards beyond her father’s.
“We each got our own spheres of interest and influnence. That’s Vinta’s.”
HD – What else is her sphere? How does she feel about Caine?
“We all got chapters in the book of our lives that we’re done with.”
HD – Does the ghost of Gaius and his crimes still haunt Northern and Central Amber?
“There was a lotta bad stuff went down all over Amber and beyond, done by every factions. We all still live in the shadow of those days.
HD – Should they be putting statues up to Gaius and other civil war war criminals?”
“I don’t think I’m gonna let you pursue this line of questionin’ any further, because the answers are gonna put me in a place I don’t wanna be. Caine got caught, and that’s the only diff – no. I’m not touchin’ this. Next question.”
HD – Do you have a pet? Any plans?
“Unlce Julian gave the kids a pair of hellhound puppies, so we pretty much got our hands full.”
HD – What do you think of the Bear Cult?
“I try not to.”